The tugboat and the lighthouse

Both provide a valuable service to others in need.

The tug boat is maneuverable, powerful for its size, and can help disabled ships much larger than itself. It usually serves the harbors and typically helps one ship at a time by using force to tug, nudge, and push. Only some tugboats are ocean-going since most would be wrecked by the forces of the open water.

The lighthouse serves as a navigational aid for ships at night or in fog. It typically marks treacherous coastlines, safe entries to harbors, and even assists in aerial navigation. Because it casts its beam as far as the eye can see, ships both at sea and in the harbor are guided by its glow.

In contrast to the tugboat, the lighthouse stays planted firmly and leads by shining its light. It’s not damaged when it cuts through a storm to send rays of hope to a troubled vessel. It holds steady and lets those seeking the way adjust their own course.

The eldest of tugboats last for 70-80 years.

Compare that to the Tower of Hercules, the oldest surviving lighthouse in the world, which was built in the 2nd century CE.

We all at some point try to be a tugboat for someone we love.

Many become so frustrated or traumatized that they give up trying to help at all.

There is a third way.

Build trust by standing firmly for something.

Hold space by staying put and letting others find their way.

Facilitate the process by shining your light for those looking to see.

Be a lighthouse.